Hi everyone, short post lah, erm so basically i red this horoscope thingy which i think is really accurate speaking I do and feel the things stated above. And when my sister got home, i asked her if she was a taurus (knowing she was an aries) as she kept saying she was tired. I told her like taurus like to sleep and can be lazy.  It was during this time when she said," Arent you a taurus? You ARE lazy, you have no motivation in life" which ticked me off so i shouted "omg u r such a bitch", she thought i meant it as a joke and laughed. 

But okay, i am seriously vexed now. There is no one i can count on in this family. yes sometimes we talk and have fun, but whats the big deal when in long term we do not actually show care for each other. I am the closest to Nadine, but still, who likes someone hanging out with their friends all the time, and plus turning on you whenever they feel like it. I feel they are as screwed up as I am and I can see it. They are so rude. Day in and out telling me," Naomi, nobody likes you"or saying something mean about me and then saying, " jie, i say this because i love you". For fuck, if you had any respect you would not say this shit. 

I am counting a lot on my friends now, I know, they say , when you are in trouble, who is gonna help you, your friends meh? WELL SO FAR, YES. We have a mutual understanding. They help me when i need them and i help them when they need me. If i did not have enough money, will my older sister lend me? NO? she will say things like, "you should have not spend so rashly", my younger brother and sister do though. but its like meals and stuff. No i did not take their money, and if i did, i would return them. Thing is , it happened only when i was really broke after lending my friends money for their stuff. As of now, most of them have returned me the money. I am not one to beg and chase people for money... my parents though are different. They would tell me not to hang out with them or bring in their race saying " that kind of people always like that, if you end them, you can take it as you gave them the money". You do not know my friends, i know them well enough to trust them and i guess they feel the same way. 

Plus, its not like I am getting enough support from you guys anyway. Sometimes, school gets tough, and you feel stressed and you get suicidal thoughts or thoughts of just ending school. When i discuss this with them its like the only thing they can say," Quit lah, next time you no money you don't find me" etc, NOTHING NICE, or comforting. They say I am lazy and i should just work harder. if only they were in my class, they would see how much my classmates are struggling to reach deadlines, shouting about, raising our hands when the year 3s asked," who here just wants to finish, not caring about the grade you are gonna have?" You can say we are really at the edge of the cliff, we are gonna fall off, but whats stopping us? EACH OTHER. We are helping ourselves, we wanna graduate together. Thats all. Hence, i count more on my friends than my family. Support. I just need support, knowing they will be there when i get an award and shit, But no, i cannot even get that. Everything i do, they question with me, doubting my abilities. Why do you take so much pleasure in bringing me down?

Why say things like." why the room so smelly? Naomi is it you?" No it is not fucking funny, its offensive. I just showered. I know for a fact i do not stink. People around me always say i smell nice. Then why is it at home, i smell like crap? Rubbish. As a kid, i was sweaty and i did not like to shower, so that was when they felt i stink. but now? its changed and its really sad when they smell something funky in the house and the first thing they do is smell me to see if i was the source. 

Back to the supporting part, i told my sister i wanted to go to Africa and help kids after graduation, and what is the first thing she said? " Ya, you think you will have enough money to go there meh? You do not even have money to go Thailand" Well sorry I am not the kind that save, but i am already doing something about it right? Plus, i told her i was going to work and save enough money. Can't you just say "oh good idea" or something NICE? No, you can't. Saying nice things just isn't the way this family talks. It is always about the negatives.

Moving on to an incident that happened recently. My mom as you know, is going through Menopause. So recently, after my younger sister left for choir practice and said bye, she replied very enthusiastically, "BYE BYE BYE BYEEEEEE". My sister obviously did not reply anymore as she said bye already. My mom got upset and shouted," I did not hear a reply". After which she started crying. At this point, I was in my room, using my phone. "Naomi, come here naomi, naomi i am so scared, please come here!" My mom shouted, from the kitchen. I rushed over of course, she continued, still crying," I do not know why i am like this", hearing this, my dad came to the scene, then she stopped crying. she went to the window(she was hanging clothes), and waved her hands towards the street . She then started laughing really loudly. My dad and i figured she was better so we slowly walked out of the kitchen. Then she said to me," crazy right your mother". How am i supposed to react? I was scared. I tried to hug her when she was crying but she brushed me off. 

Haiz, so thats what has been going on so far. Nothing interesting, nothing different, really hope my sister stops being such a.. idk, there is no word. ELITE? she is looking down on me, sometimes even saying its my school. Sorry i never go jc or nus. at least my personality is better than yours and I do not look down on people who score worse than me, or judge their choices in life.

k, bye, wow wasn't as short as i thought it will be. lol

Hi everyone, short post lah, erm so basically i red this horoscope thingy which i think is really accurate speaking I do and feel the things stated above. And when my sister got home, i asked her if she was a taurus (knowing she was an aries) as she kept saying she was tired. I told her like taurus like to sleep and can be lazy.  It was during this time when she said," Arent you a taurus? You ARE lazy, you have no motivation in life" which ticked me off so i shouted "omg u r such a bitch", she thought i meant it as a joke and laughed. 

But okay, i am seriously vexed now. There is no one i can count on in this family. yes sometimes we talk and have fun, but whats the big deal when in long term we do not actually show care for each other. I am the closest to Nadine, but still, who likes someone hanging out with their friends all the time, and plus turning on you whenever they feel like it. I feel they are as screwed up as I am and I can see it. They are so rude. Day in and out telling me," Naomi, nobody likes you"or saying something mean about me and then saying, " jie, i say this because i love you". For fuck, if you had any respect you would not say this shit. 

I am counting a lot on my friends now, I know, they say , when you are in trouble, who is gonna help you, your friends meh? WELL SO FAR, YES. We have a mutual understanding. They help me when i need them and i help them when they need me. If i did not have enough money, will my older sister lend me? NO? she will say things like, "you should have not spend so rashly", my younger brother and sister do though. but its like meals and stuff. No i did not take their money, and if i did, i would return them. Thing is , it happened only when i was really broke after lending my friends money for their stuff. As of now, most of them have returned me the money. I am not one to beg and chase people for money... my parents though are different. They would tell me not to hang out with them or bring in their race saying " that kind of people always like that, if you end them, you can take it as you gave them the money". You do not know my friends, i know them well enough to trust them and i guess they feel the same way. 

Plus, its not like I am getting enough support from you guys anyway. Sometimes, school gets tough, and you feel stressed and you get suicidal thoughts or thoughts of just ending school. When i discuss this with them its like the only thing they can say," Quit lah, next time you no money you don't find me" etc, NOTHING NICE, or comforting. They say I am lazy and i should just work harder. if only they were in my class, they would see how much my classmates are struggling to reach deadlines, shouting about, raising our hands when the year 3s asked," who here just wants to finish, not caring about the grade you are gonna have?" You can say we are really at the edge of the cliff, we are gonna fall off, but whats stopping us? EACH OTHER. We are helping ourselves, we wanna graduate together. Thats all. Hence, i count more on my friends than my family. Support. I just need support, knowing they will be there when i get an award and shit, But no, i cannot even get that. Everything i do, they question with me, doubting my abilities. Why do you take so much pleasure in bringing me down?

Why say things like." why the room so smelly? Naomi is it you?" No it is not fucking funny, its offensive. I just showered. I know for a fact i do not stink. People around me always say i smell nice. Then why is it at home, i smell like crap? Rubbish. As a kid, i was sweaty and i did not like to shower, so that was when they felt i stink. but now? its changed and its really sad when they smell something funky in the house and the first thing they do is smell me to see if i was the source. 

Back to the supporting part, i told my sister i wanted to go to Africa and help kids after graduation, and what is the first thing she said? " Ya, you think you will have enough money to go there meh? You do not even have money to go Thailand" Well sorry I am not the kind that save, but i am already doing something about it right? Plus, i told her i was going to work and save enough money. Can't you just say "oh good idea" or something NICE? No, you can't. Saying nice things just isn't the way this family talks. It is always about the negatives.

Moving on to an incident that happened recently. My mom as you know, is going through Menopause. So recently, after my younger sister left for choir practice and said bye, she replied very enthusiastically, "BYE BYE BYE BYEEEEEE". My sister obviously did not reply anymore as she said bye already. My mom got upset and shouted," I did not hear a reply". After which she started crying. At this point, I was in my room, using my phone. "Naomi, come here naomi, naomi i am so scared, please come here!" My mom shouted, from the kitchen. I rushed over of course, she continued, still crying," I do not know why i am like this", hearing this, my dad came to the scene, then she stopped crying. she went to the window(she was hanging clothes), and waved her hands towards the street . She then started laughing really loudly. My dad and i figured she was better so we slowly walked out of the kitchen. Then she said to me," crazy right your mother". How am i supposed to react? I was scared. I tried to hug her when she was crying but she brushed me off. 

Haiz, so thats what has been going on so far. Nothing interesting, nothing different, really hope my sister stops being such a.. idk, there is no word. ELITE? she is looking down on me, sometimes even saying its my school. Sorry i never go jc or nus. at least my personality is better than yours and I do not look down on people who score worse than me, or judge their choices in life.

k, bye, wow wasn't as short as i thought it will be. lol