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Afflicted with your presence

"I puddle at the door, my face looking like a deck of falling cards, like everything's been playing me."


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Cars
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Today was a rather, emotion packed day. I am having a lot of thoughts running through my mind as i type each letter in this post, because i know somewhere, someone is reading. And I know who. My blog is now the only one existing. compared to them. i am not sure if they made new ones but its alright. They were together, today. after the talk. i cant say much here either. people are reading. people who are not supposed to know what happened that night in the backroom. i think for another 30 seconds, Naomi, when are you gonna go home? & how are you going to do so? Confused as i am, i do not know. I am trying to absorb my deeckbaf. Haha that is so obvious right, but it is alright. it was meant to be that way. Am i angry with what they said? No i am not. Can i take it? yes of course, but i will need time. This is cause they are not ordinary people, they are people who mean a lot to me. even if i mean scrap to them, it doesn't matter. The things they brought up are stuff i did not expect. That is why i need time to take the "blow". i prepared myself for something worse, something more complex, but with people i wasn't very close to, so it wouldn't matter if it didn't like me or not. Sitting at the sides of empty streets, watching the cars drive by, mostly taxis, my mind is unweaving, it would be one of those days where i will enjoy this kind of solitude. I do not know what else to say. I am so tired of everything. I need strength to get up now. How will i what the world has installed for me tomorrow?  it is raining oh dear, okay. Naomi, Back to reality.